Building a personal brand on Instagram is cool—until your friends start unfollowing you

“Influenzaaaa,” a friend jokingly commented on one of my posts, poking fun at how I’d suddenly become so consistent with my Instagram updates. It was meant to be playful, but it made me feel conscious, judged. After the release of my debut romance novel, Red Flags and Rishtas, I knew that building a personal brand on Instagram was crucial to market the book and connect with authors and readers worldwide. It felt like a no-brainer. I started posting every day, stepping out of my comfort zone to experiment with reels and trends. But as I spent more time curating my digital presence, I quickly noticed that not everyone around me was as supportive as I had hoped. What began as a professional effort to expand my reach soon became a source of surprising tension. Some peers unfollowed or muted me, presumably because I was posting too much, others questioned why I was dedicating so much energy online instead of focusing on writing.

And they weren’t entirely wrong. I would have loved to invest all that time into writing my next book, but what’s the point of that if it wouldn’t find its audience? As much as ‘serious artists’ don’t like to admit, social media is the most powerful marketing tool in this digital age, and ignoring it isn’t the smartest decision. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, freelancer or artist, visibility is currency. More followers mean more opportunities, more connections, more impact and more sales. And that’s the motivation driving so many people today to build a presence on social media. It’s not about living a glamorous life, scoring freebies or travelling the world like influencers of the past. “People often confuse consistency with craving attention. But building a brand—especially a personal brand on Instagram—takes strategy, creativity and consistency,” says Smriti Agarwal, founder of wedding social media brand Mush Me Too. At times, you may even wonder if your friends are secretly laughing at your feeble attempts to increase your followers or worse, dissecting it on a group chat with you. Put on blinders. “If someone sees it as ‘wannabe influencing,’ that’s their lens. I know it’s passion, not performance,” Agarwal adds.

When your online journey starts moving beyond personal expression and into a more niche, business-driven space, some people—even those you think of as friends—will inevitably drop off, and that’s okay. For Samarth Khanna, founder of fashion brand Kaleshkari, this is a natural part of the process—what they like to think of as digital ‘natural selection’. “If people are not engaging with my content or are unfollowing me, then that means that this is not the kind of content they want to see. I don’t take it personally. It’ll only take me closer to the kind of community that I do want to build,” they explain.