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How to be more patient, according to therapists

They say patience is a virtue. But no one really teaches you how to be more patient, whether you’re dealing with long lines, traffic delays or a partner asking “Wait, what did you say again?” for the third time in a row.

It’s true that some folks naturally are more patient than others. According to Geoffrey Gold, PhD, a psychologist at Therapists of New York, certain personality traits are better at adjusting to uncertainty, say, or more willing to give others the benefit of the doubt. But patience isn’t necessarily a quality you have to be born with—it’s also something you can work on. “It involves building emotional skills like being able to sit with feelings of boredom, frustration, and anxiety, along with mindfulness and self-compassion,” Dr Gold tells SELF.

If playing the waiting game isn’t your strong suit, we’ve got you covered. Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to be more patient in your everyday life.

1. Redefine what it actually means to be patient

If your idea of patience looks like being endlessly agreeable, never getting annoyed and staying calm through any inconvenience…. Yeah, no wonder it feels impossible. That version of patience isn’t realistic and, honestly, it’s not a standard to aim for.

Patience is more about learning to let go of the need to control everything. “For people who tend to be impatient, there’s a lack of acceptance,” Fanny Tristan, LCSW, a psychotherapist and founder of Restority Space in New York City, tells SELF. “Not wanting to accept how long something is taking, not accepting that it takes time to understand a new concept or skill”—it can naturally bring up frustration, restlessness and even anger.

On the flip side, people who seem effortlessly go-with-the-flow “are usually more comfortable and grounded in the reality that things can be really messy,” Tristan says. They know that a tech glitch might derail their entire work day, for instance, or that a date they vibed with may not reply right away. It’s not about loving (or even liking) these unpredictable hiccups, necessarily: It’s about learning to roll with them without it destroying your mood (which brings us to our next few pointers).

2. Get out of your head and into someone else’s shoes

A big reason we get so frazzled when life doesn’t go our way? We’re holding onto a bunch of unspoken “shoulds,” both experts say. The waiter should be faster. Your roommate should do the dishes by the end of the day. Your injury should be healed after following the doctor’s orders.


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Collagen decline 101: how it affects skin, joints, and hair

Collagen decline isn’t dramatic; it begins quietly. Like a WhatsApp group you once loved that now only sends birthday messages. One day, you’re bouncing out of bed with springy knees and plump skin. Next, your joints make new and unsettling noises. Your hair tie wraps around three times instead of two.

What’s shifting is collagen: the protein shaping your face, bracing your joints and bolstering your hair from the root. It holds more than you realise, until it doesn’t.

So it’s no wonder collagen is having a moment. We’re stirring it into coffee, sipping it between meetings, chewing it like candy. The control you feel over rebuilding stronger skin, smoother joints and shinier hair feels oddly comforting in a world that’s threatening to come apart at the seams. Collagen decline is the slow, structural unravelling of things that once felt unshakeable and the very human urge to hold on.

What is collagen?

Collagen is the most abundant protein in our bodies that; think of it as the biological glue that keeps your features firm, your body upright and your bounce intact. There are at least 28 types, but Types I, II and III are the headliners:

  • Type I: Skin, bones, tendons, ligaments, accounts for 90% of the body’s collagen
  • Type II: Cartilage and joints
  • Type III: Skin, blood vessels, internal organs

Your body makes collagen by combining amino acids from protein-rich foods with help from vitamin C, zinc, and copper. But from your mid-to-late twenties onwards, production begins to dip by about 1% a year.

As Dr Rinky Kapoor, consultant dermatologist at The Esthetic Clinics, tells Vogue India: “The decrease is 1% every year post your 20s, and when you reach your 40s, the production dwindles even further, displaying signs of ageing.”

What does collagen decline look like on the outside?

Skin: Less bounce, more sag

Collagen gives skin its structure and firmness. As levels drop, you start noticing:

  • Fine lines and wrinkles (the classics)
  • Loss of elasticity and plumpness
  • Dryness, dullness and slower wound healing

“The collagen in our skin reflects a delicate equilibrium between synthesis and degradation,” Mercedes Abarquero Cerezo, pharmacist and head of scientific projects at L’Oréal Dermatological Beauty Spain, tells Vogue Spain. “As we age, the cells responsible for collagen production slow down. At the same time, a host of external and internal factors—from sun exposure and diet to stress and hormonal shifts, particularly during menopause—can speed up its breakdown.”

But, she adds, “Our body is a system in flux. Collagen is always being broken down and always being rebuilt. The issue arises when this rhythm falls out of sync—when production dips or quality declines. That’s when the visible signs of ageing start to emerge.”

Hair: Weaker roots, slower growth

Collagen surrounds and supports the hair follicle. With less of it, you may experience:

  • Hair thinning
  • Increased breakage
  • Slower growth
  • A dry or irritated scalp

Joints: The creak becomes a chorus

Type II collagen cushions your joints. When it declines:

  • Cartilage becomes weaker and thinner
  • You might feel stiffness or joint pain, especially post-exercise
  • Recovery slows, inflammation lingers

It’s not just an ageing issue. Athletes, dancers and anyone with a history of intense physical activity may feel the effects earlier than expected.

The deeper effects: gut, bones and mood

Collagen is also found in your gut lining, which is why some nutritionists link collagen decline to digestive issues or increased gut permeability (the trendy ‘leaky gut’). Our bones are 30% collagen, so declining levels can contribute to decreased bone density over time.

Emerging research even links collagen to mood and energy, via its role in the gut-brain axis and amino acid balance. The science is early, but the anecdotes are everywhere.

Can you slow down collagen decline?

You can’t stop it, per say, (unless you’ve discovered a time machine, in which case, please share) but you can support production and reduce the speed of decline.

Load up on the right nutrients:

  • Protein (eggs, fish, chicken, tofu) for amino acids
  • Vitamin C (amla, oranges, bell peppers) for synthesis
  • Zinc + copper (nuts, seeds, shellfish) as cofactors

Avoid collagen saboteurs:

  • Sugar and ultra-processed foods (they trigger glycation, damaging existing collagen)
  • Smoking + pollution (oxidative stress = collagen breakdown)
  • Unprotected sun exposure (UVA rays are collagen’s worst enemy)

The supplement question: hype or help?

There’s growing evidence that they can help, as long as your expectations are realistic. “Collagen peptide intake can improve hydration, and reduce fine lines, wrinkles, and sunspots,” says Dr Renita Rajan tells Vogue India. “Initial results can be seen at four weeks, but maximum benefits occur upon elongated usage at 12–16 weeks.”

Formulation matters. Look for hydrolysed collagen (also labelled as collagen peptides), which is easier to absorb, and ingredients like vitamin C or hyaluronic acid that support collagen synthesis.

It’s not a one-and-done fix but if you’re the kind of person who remembers to take their supplements most days, it may well earn its place in your routine.

Should you start a collagen-building regimen?

Only if you want to. Collagen decline is part of the human condition, not a flaw to fix. But if you’re curious about why your skin feels different, why your joints ache after sitting too long or why your once-bouncy curls feel limp it’s worth knowing what’s happening underneath.


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The Kolhapuri never went out of style in India, even though it just got its Prada runway moment

At Prada’s Spring Summer 2026 menswear show, the Kolhapuri strolled in, calm and unbothered, under cotton poplins and colourful raffia hats. No embellishment, no twist. A flat leather sandal in its elemental form, like it had been pulled straight from a street in Kolhapur, Maharashtra and dropped into a Milanese moodboard.

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To call it a moment of revival would be lazy. In India, the Kolhapuri has never gone out of style. It’s the rare accessory that has crossed rituals, errands and runways without once losing relevance. The only thing seasonal about it is the monsoon, during which any self-respecting wearer knows to switch to rubber. By the 1970s, it had already stepped into the West’s counterculture wardrobe, carried along by the freewheeling spirit of the hippie movement.

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MUMBAI (BOMBAY), INDIA – MARCH 28: Model Milind Soman walks the runway for the ‘MAI MUMBAI’ show, a ‘Fashion for Relief’ initiative by DREAM by Vikram Chatway Hotels for the relief of the Terrorist Attack victims in Mumbai at the Lakme India Fashion Week Autumn/ Winter 2009, at Grand Hyatt on March 28, 2009 in Mumbai, India. (Photo by Ritam Banerjee/Getty Images)

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What keeps it current? Possibly the fact that it doesn’t try. The Kolhapuri is handmade. Sun-dried. GI tagged since 2019. And still crafted by artisans across eight districts in Maharashtra and Karnataka, who continue to stitch legacy into every pair.

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Latest OTT releases (June 23-June 29): 9 new movies and TV shows on Netflix, Prime Video, JioHotstar and more

City-bred secretary Abhishek Tripathi (Jitendra Kumar) returns to the rustic rhythms of Phulera, where he finds the village in election fever as two formidable rivals, Manju Devi and Kranti Devi, gear up for a no-holds-barred panchayat showdown. With rally songs, grand promises and shady mud‑splattering tactics, the once‑quiet lanes of Phulera erupt into a carnival of chaos. As Abhishek tries to walk the tightrope of neutrality, his own future and Pradhan Ji’s hard‑won leadership hang in the balance. The show also stars Ragubir Yadav, Neena Gupta, Faisal Malik and Chandan Roy, among others.

Streaming on Prime Video

Train Wreck: Poop Cruise (June 24)

Train Wreck: Poop Cruise is a gripping documentary that revisits the infamous 2013 Carnival Triumph disaster, where a luxury cruise turned into a floating health hazard. What began as a routine trip from Galveston to Cozumel spiralled into chaos after an engine fire knocked out power, leaving over 4,000 people stranded in the Gulf of Mexico without air-conditioning, plumbing or refrigeration. The film chronicles the horrifying conditions that followed, overflowing toilets, makeshift tents on deck and the slow psychological unravelling of passengers stuck in sweltering filth. Through raw passenger footage, news coverage and retrospective interviews, the documentary unpacks the corporate missteps, media frenzy and the resilience of those aboard.


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Horoscope Today: June 23, 2025

Cosmic tip: Set yourself free from your past expectations. Embrace your present moment and ask what matters to you most today.

Slow down. When was the last time you read a good book? When was the last time you did something because it brought you joy? When was the last time you simply chose to break free from a default cycle and shake things up gently? Sag, it is great to have a full plate, one that feels nourishing. You know what is not so enriching to have? A seemingly busy schedule doing things that won’t even matter to you in the long term. This message has been coming up on repeat for you lately. So it may be time to reassess your priorities. If the cosmos has been sending in sirens, it may be time to reevaluate and choose wisely.

Cosmic tip: Choose to break free by choosing something different.

There is an invisible force helping you carry your weight in this lifetime, Capricorn, and you can lean in, sink in and ask this force to simply push forward with greater intensity, taking charge of all that feels too heavy for you to carry. You deserve prosperity, and you deserve abundance, and these are not merely material things; these are emotions and frequencies of ease and safety within yourself. You have done a lot throughout your life, even worked through some major karmic soul lessons. Now is your time to allow the Universe to step in and really enjoy the rest of your ride through this Earth plane.

Cosmic tip: Bless yourself more often. See your strengths more often. Smile more often. It shifts your frequency.

Your past may have taught you to be black and white, to process yourself and everything in life as good or bad. But you see, Aquarius now that you are waking up to life, now that you are emerging from your cocoon, your thoughts ideas and beliefs are helping you remember that there is no good or bad, right or wrong, everything is subjective and truth, as we call it, is multifaceted and multidimensional. When you hold a ball in your hand, you see one side of it, and the person standing on the other side sees the other part of it. Both are correct and both are incomplete, subjective. And this revelation is now bringing you peace.

Cosmic tip: Happiness finds you when you simplify life.

Your job? To simply trust your talents, to simply trust your effort and to simply sink into your enoughness, not from a place of entitlement or complacency, but from a space of knowing when you have put your best foot forward. Then ask your angels to wave their magic wand and release the need to control the outcome of everything you cross paths with. You see, you may find your frustration mounting at times because you no longer are who you were but you are also learning to adapt to this person you are now, this version that feels so raw and so you that it still comes in with a little bit of guilt around displeasing others, around not getting it right, around failure or anything else. Make the changes you know are necessary. Take the chances that you know will get you there.

Cosmic tip: Allow your skills and talents to be seen.


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I look at empty movie theatres in India and realise we’re losing more than just a night out

I arrive early, always. Third row from the back, where the velvet seats still hold whispers of a hundred films gone by. The theatre smells faintly of dust and popcorn, and the lights haven’t dimmed yet, but I’m already wrapped in its cocoon. I pretend to scroll through my phone, though there’s no one to message. No late friend arriving with popcorn. No familiar voice whispering beside me. Just me and the flicker of a world I’m about to enter alone.

It didn’t start as a preference. Watching films alone was simply a by-product of the job. As a journalist covering cinema, I’d often be at 8am screenings, bleary-eyed and underslept, trying to make sense of films before the rest of the world had finished breakfast. The first time, it felt like an inconvenience. By the tenth, a habit. By the twentieth, something close to devotion.

The theatre, with its fraying carpet and flickering EXIT signs, became a space where no one asked questions. Not about why I was alone. Not about whether I needed company. Here, solitude wasn’t something to explain away—it was allowed.

Subha Jayanagaraja, an entertainment journalist from Mangalore, tells me, “I’ve come to like watching films by myself because of sheer force of circumstances. I go and invariably end up purchasing four or five tickets, whatever is the bare minimum needed to ensure that the film is screened.” According to her, it’s worth the therapeutic experience it affords her.

I understand exactly what she means. There is something intensely private about watching a story unfold in the dark, the characters blooming before you in a silence you don’t have to share. It is a form of therapy with no dialogue. Just a transaction between you and the screen.

Meghna Singhal, a therapist, calls it immersion. “You’re mostly not distracted by your phone, you cannot pause the movie, you can’t respond to your to-do list or anything else that needs your attention. It’s just you and the story unfolding on the screen.”

And then there are the moments when the story does more than unfold. It tugs. The anonymity of the dark allows you to feel without performing. I cried through the last twenty minutes of Superboys of Malegaon (2024). Not a dainty, cinematic tear; the real, shoulder-shaking kind. No one noticed. Or if they did, they didn’t care. There is grace in being ignored.


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The bride wore a 30-foot train to marry in an ancient basilica at this Catholic-Sikh wedding in Rome

It wouldn’t be a small ceremony, either. The couple decided to highlight their two cultural backgrounds by hosting both a hybrid Sikh and Roman-Catholic wedding with 300 guests and four days of events. The celebrations included a mehendi, a sangeet, a tholi ceremony, a baraat, an anand karaj ceremony, and a Catholic wedding ceremony at the Basilica of Santa Maria in Trastevere, a church built in the third century B.C. With such an extensive itinerary, the couple decided to take almost two years to bring the September 2025 celebrations to life, with the help of wedding planner Emma Docwra of Love Italy Weddings.

“There is a lot that goes into planning a multicultural destination wedding, and we felt that having meticulous planners was crucial. We took several trips to Rome and India for meetings with our vendors and cake tasting and planning trips,” Elisa explains. “We went the extra mile to make sure that everything was organised smoothly and that everyone had an amazing time celebrating. The memories we made together with our families were priceless throughout the whole process, as both of our families were very involved in helping to make the weekend happen.”

The sangeet night took place on September 21 at Palazzo Brancaccio, a historic residence in the city centre with lush gardens and opulent interiors. The evening also included a tholi ceremony, a tradition in Sikh weddings marking the bride’s departure from her family home and entry into her new life with her husband. “We made our first entrance into the gardens to kick off the weekend and greet all of our guests for the first time to Frank Sinatra’s ‘All or Nothing at All.’ After the tholi processional, we had a surprise private performance once all the guests entered the venue from Jaz Dhami, i.e. ‘the pioneer of Punjabi R&B,’ who we flew in from London,” the couple says. “The energy and surprise in the room when he came out was insane, and we’ll never forget the dancing.”

The bride wanted to wear a more contemporary Indian sharara set for the sangeet. “This was the event where I wanted to have fun, express myself, and show a bit more skin—in a tasteful way,” Elisa says. “I found an off-shoulder embroidered white, silver sequin, and crystal set from Indian couture designer Seema Gujral and fell in love with how it draped. I felt so glamorous and comfortable, and it was the perfect look to complement the ornate interiors of Palazzo Brancaccio.” She paired the set with embroidered Mach & Mach and jewellery borrowed from Angad’s family. “It meant so much to me to be able to wear pieces that had such special, sentimental value to the both of us throughout the weekend, and especially to honour those who could no longer be with us to celebrate,” she says. For his look, Angad decided to wear a custom-tailored black Canali suit, an Hermès tie and pocket square, and Tom Ford shoes. “He also got to wear my late grandfather’s tie clip, who gave it to Angad before he passed away,” says the bride.


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Is ginseng an alternative to retinol?

In China and Korea, ginseng has been used in the pharmacopoeia for thousands of years. Not least because it is traditionally associated with longevity. It has positive effects on memory, acts as an energy booster, increases libido, strengthens the immune system and, above all, has anti-inflammatory properties, which help reduce intestinal swelling and digestive disorders.

In the cosmetics field, the ginseng root is one of the pillars of Korean skincare, due to its energising, antioxidant, hydrating and anti-ageing properties. It is no coincidence that the scientific name of its plant, panax, has the same root as the term “panacea”.

“It is considered the most precious plant in Asia, once reserved for kings”, explains Audrey Faure Grousson, doctor of pharmacy and project manager for active ingredients at the Korean make-up and skincare brand Erborian. “It is also one of the most studied plant species in the world, and it has not yet revealed all its secrets.”

The benefits of ginseng for the skin

Although the properties of ginseng are not yet fully known, we know that this plant, present in both East Asia and North America, is a particularly powerful ingredient for combating oxidative stress and premature ageing of cells. This is mainly due to the four active ingredients contained in its root:

Vitamin C: helps maintain skin elasticity and participates in collagen synthesis;

Vitamin E: strengthens the skin’s hydrolipidic film;

Vitamin B: reduces inflammation;

Ginsenosides: stimulate cell regeneration, improve elasticity and tone, reduce wrinkles and fine lines and give brightness to the skin.

Red Ginseng vs white ginseng

Ginseng root is used in two variants: red and white. The so-called “red ginseng” comes from roots that are at least 6 years old and owes its colour to a conservation process that involves treating the root with high-temperature steam (120-130°) for 2-3 hours before drying. White ginseng, on the other hand, is obtained from younger roots, 4 years old, which are washed, scraped and then dried.

Although the difference between the two types is essentially the age of the root and the processing, some studies suggest that white ginseng, undergoing minimal heat treatment, better maintains the original profile of ginsenosides and, consequently, their effectiveness.

Should you swap retinol with ginseng?

The exceptional antioxidant properties of ginseng have led several skincare brands to incorporate this naturally derived ingredient into their product formulas. The aforementioned K-brand Erborian, for example, has created a super-powerful complex, the White Ginseng Complex, which combines the benefits of white ginseng with those of extracts of other plant species, in particular licorice (soothing, refreshing), wild yam (hydrating), horsetail (stimulates collagen production) and kigelia (toning, firming, regenerating).

Some studies suggest that ginseng could even be an alternative to what is now considered the star ingredient in skincare, retinol (which is a chemical compound derived from vitamin A), equalling its benefits but without the drawbacks, such as photosensitivity and the risk of causing irritation, redness and flaking (especially in the first phase of use).

This article first appeared on Vogue.fr

Also read:

Retinol vs retinoid–what to start and when, according to experts

NAD+ skincare, IVs and the future of your face

Matcha is the mood


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5 signs you’re in a codependent friendship, according to experts

So instead of offering support, you might find yourself trying to fix or control their mood just to soothe your own. That might lead you to spot them money because they’re anxious about their monthly bills (even though doing so puts you in a tough spot, too). Or losing sleep over their family drama. Basically, “there’s no space in the relationship for you to have and process your own, different feelings,” Martin says, which will only set you up for disappointment down the line.

3. Your other relationships are slipping

Even if you’re lucky enough to have one go-to, amazing bestie—the person who listens to your unhinged vent sessions and understands your oddly niche memes—it’s important (healthy, actually) to have other people in your social network, too. That could mean family and additional friends, of course, but also coworkers you actually like or even more casual acquaintances who see a different side of you.

With codependency, though, “people often start giving up other friendships, relationships and meaningful interests,” Martin says. “That could be a hobby they stopped because their friend doesn’t do it, or a different friend they stop hanging out with because their BFF doesn’t like or know them.”

No matter how soulmate-y your particular bond feels, relying on just one person for everything puts a lot of pressure on them—and cuts you off from other sources of support and joy, Martin points out. (Like…what happens when you need a pep talk but they’re mid-crisis themselves? Or they’re not the right person when it comes to parenting advice?)

4. You get possessive when they spend time with others

A little jealousy or sadness when your BFF is having fun with someone else isn’t automatically a red flag. In fact, FOMO is pretty common (and human), and odds are, you probably still want them to have a happy, full social life beyond your connection—even when part of you wishes you were included. But when those feelings tip into resentment—as if you’re entitled to 100% of their time and attention, or their connection with another pal somehow threatens yours—that could be a sign that you’re in a codependent friendship, Chu says.

In these cases, you might slip into insecure or controlling thought patterns that sound like, “They’re replacing me…I can feel it,” or, “HOW DARE THEY GO TO A PARTY WITHOUT ASKING ME TO BE THEIR PLUS-ONE!!!” It may even just come out as a passive-aggressive swipe-up on their Instagram story (“Guess I’m not that important to you anymore…”).


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Tara Sutaria’s ivory jacket and dhoti pant set by Ritika Mirchandani took 280 hours of embroidery

Tara Sutaria dresses as if she has multiple personalities. One day, you’ll see her embrace power dressing in a sharp tuxedo. Next, channelling that girl-next-door aesthetic in a flirty midi dress. Then, flaunting an Indian look that seems straight from the bygone era. While the actor’s nonchalant wardrobe is a polarised spectrum of elevated essentials, her traditional closet is not. Sutaria often leans on timeless classics for festive and formal occasions. Take, for example, her latest Ritika Mirchandani dhoti set in ivory.

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Streamlined and yet statement-making, her look was styled by Tanya Ghavri. “The look features a cut-sleeve beaded blouse paired with an Alamy high-low jacket with padded shoulders and signature pinwheel dhoti pants, all in tonal ivory. The entire outfit is intricately hand-embroidered using bugle beads and poth work,” revealed Mirchandani. Over 280 hours of embroidery and 40 hours of hand stitching went into bringing this monochromatic piece to life, which “reflects the label’s detail-driven, modern aesthetic with a luxe, artisanal finish,” the designer adds.

Unmissable, too, is that her outfit is anchored to nothing more attention-seeking than a pair of drop earrings. Her pick? The handcrafted Anvi danglers from Anayah Jewellery with clear gemstones and gold plating. With her hair left open in a straight blow dry, she kept to her signature dewy makeup look, featuring a velvety base, soft smoky eyes with loads of mascara and nude gloss for that glass-like finish. For footwear, she went with metallic heels.

If you have a destination celebration earmarked on your calendar, consider an effortless silhouette like the actor’s Ritika Mirchandani look. Given that out-of-town affairs demand comfort and style, a dhoti set makes for that ‘minimal effort, maximum impact’ choice.

Also read:

Tara Sutaria channels effortless beauty with a soft smokey eye and glossy lips

Kajol’s functional jumpsuit by Payal Khandwala was created from dupion and mulberry silk

Samantha Ruth Prabhu’s ivory sari draws from the Art Deco movement




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