Why playing video games with your partner is the world’s easiest compatibility test

Cooking among the clouds might sound like a bucket list item for most aspiring chefs, but I have little time for the idyllic landscape blanketed below and even less time to notice the storm clouds bunching ominously on the horizon. Without warning, a flash of lightning strikes and the hot air balloon starts we’re in plummeting towards the ground. The ingredients I had meticulously chopped are careening wildly, rocked back and forth by the wind. I am certain there is a plate somewhere at hand, but my visibility is impaired by the plumes of fire lining the way.

My husband is frantically calling out instructions from the other side of the fray—whether words of encouragement or crucial troubleshooting information, I will never know. All my attention is on the burger in my hand and the counter that lies just out of reach. Before I can entertain any thoughts about serving this order and saving the day, the words ‘game over’ flash mockingly on the screen, and I sink back into the sofa cushions in defeat. My fingers release their death grip on the controller, and my breathing returns to normal as my eyes stray to the far right of the screen. “The fire extinguisher was right next to me the whole time. I could have put out the fire,” I sigh. “I know, which is why I kept asking you to reach for it,” comes the response.

There is a testiness to the air. Overcooked, a chaotic cooking simulation game, has been popularly dubbed the “ultimate friendship breaker” by the internet. “If your relationship can survive this, it can survive anything,” proclaims a meme featuring a couple barking instructions at each other as they chop, slice and dice to save their (virtual) lives.

My husband and I decided to give the game a whirl in a bid to spend more time with each other. The manic scramble to beat down zombie hordes or conquer the inferno left me limp with exhaustion, but surprisingly, our relationship emerged stronger. As we made our way through shark-infested waters, we grew to realise some fundamental truths about our relationship and how each of us responds to stress. I found that I have a difficult time with task-switching, unable to focus on anything until the task at hand has been seen through from start to finish. My husband, on the other hand, has an unflinching eye trained on the bigger picture, steering our ship in the right direction while fighting off pirates.